Dief mpreg. shut UP.

[xanphibian]

Ray: Did you find out what was wrong?

Fraser: Well, yes. I did take Diefenbaker to the veternarian. I'm not sure what to make of the diagonosis, however.

Ray: *sits down, looks worried* What is it?

Fraser: It seems ... it appears to be ... *rubs eyebrow*

Ray: Spit it out already!

Fraser: Dief is ... with child.

Ray: I know I need my ears cleaned out or something here because I could *swear* you just said Dief's pregnant.

Fraser: Your ears are just fine. Although, you probably shouldn't use Q-tips to clean them, Ray. It just pushes the wax further into your ear, where it can harden and actually be a detriment to your hearing ...

Ray: Dief is PREGNANT?

Ray: How is this even POSSIBLE? He's a boy wolf, right?

Fraser: Half wolf, actually. And, it seems, under closer inspection, only half ... boy.

Ray: You got a deaf half-wolf who's a ... whatayacallit ... hermatologist?

Fraser: Hermaphrodite, Ray. Although I'm not quite sure if that's the proper term in animals. I think I may have to do a little research on the condition.

Ray: Forget the research! Oh, god, Dief is gonna have puppies? This is so fucked up. You'd think that after a coupla years with you I'd get used to the weirdness. But it just keeps on getting weirder.

Fraser: I'm sorry, Ray.

Ray: What're you apologizing for? Did *you* get Dief pregnant?

Fraser: What? NO! It just seems that Dief was in heat at some point and I, as his ... friend, did not notice.

Ray: This is not your fault, Fraser. It's like, uh, looking for penguins in the wilds of Las Vegas. You wouldn't even think of it.

Fraser: I had this assumption about myself, that I was attentive and perceptive ...

Ray: If you don't stop guilt-tripping yourself, I'm gonna kick you right in the head. There's no *possible* way you coulda seen this coming.

Dief: *whines*

Fraser: I'm terribly sorry, Diefenbaker. I shouldn't be dwelling on my own failings at this juncture. Would you like ... some ice cream?

Ray: Yeah, Dief, you want some pickles or somethin'? Maybe a ... Frase, what do pregnant dogs like?

Dief: *growls in embarrassment and goes to hide under the bed*

Fraser: It appears he just wants to be alone for a bit.

Comments

[anatari.livejournal.com]

...

This is why I love you.

*hysterical laughter*

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*licks* Thank you!

[sars.livejournal.com]

*grins wildly*

that is hysterical :)

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

:) Thank you!

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

You're wonderful. This made me really happy, and I needed that. Thank you.

Fraser: What? NO! It just seems that Dief was in heat at some point and I, as his ... friend, did not notice.

*g* Oh Fraser.

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

I'm glad I made you happy. I'm sorry you're having such a sucky day. *snuggles you*

[traveling-storm.livejournal.com]

*howls qith laughter* Oh god, I needed that! This rules. Completely!

[traveling-storm.livejournal.com]

**with. Oi. ^^

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

:) Thank you.

[honorh.livejournal.com]

Anybody ever tell you that you need some serious help, babe?

'Cause if they have, don't get it. Hee! Cute widdle Dief puppies!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

[minim_calibre]

BWAHAHAHA!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*grins and licks you mercilessly*

[taruma16.livejournal.com]

ROFLMAO!!!
This is hilarious!
You have a weird mind and I love you for that!!!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*grins* Thank you kindly.

[aspacer.livejournal.com]

omg, crack. crack i tell you.

hugs

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*twirls you*

Yes.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

Ahahahaha. Oh, DIEF.

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

Ray's just all in the 'OMGWTFBBQ?!?!' mode, Fraser's feeling so completely guilty for "letting Dief down", and Dief's all, 'Let me just hide under the bed until it goes away, okay?'

*snugs you*

[claudia79ad.livejournal.com]

Poor, prenant Dief!

I'll give you a cookie if you write more of this. ::tempts you with cookies::

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

OH NOES! Can you just imagine Ray trying to teach Dief Lamaze breathing, and then Fraser is like 'no, no, we have to go with the Bradley method!' and Dief is like 'omg, you guys, go AWAY!'

[claudia79ad.livejournal.com]

heee! and of course I can spell pregnant. ::facepalm::

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

Of course you can, sweetie. *petpets*

[claudia79ad.livejournal.com]

:p

[geekwriter143.livejournal.com]

I'm in love with you for this.

And, look, no monkeys in this icon (though I do have to point out that the other icon is of chimpanzees, which are apes, not monkeys). You don't have prairie dog issues, do you?

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

Awww, cute icon! Monkeys are monkeys are monkeys. The only ones I don't have a problem with are gorillas, I think. I'm especially freaked by baboons. They're the worst. (god, SO SKEERY)

And yay, you are in LOVE WITH ME OMG. *draws a heart on your hand with a little arrow through it*

[mos-self.livejournal.com]

deaf half-wolf who's a ... whatayacallit ... hermatologist?

So very Ray!
Dief was in heat at some point and I, as his ... friend, did not notice.

And a great Fraser line.

Thank you for a wonderful read.

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*beams* Thank you. :)

[carnadosa.livejournal.com]

*snicker* Poor Deif.


And then one of the puppies, which is a girl, because then it'd be one against three and almost fair, totally adopts Ray, and she's somehow like a Fraser clone and makes Ray quit smoking and eat right and he has no idea how but only after she gets Fraser and Ray in bed cuz she's not stupid.

Too bad I can't actually write.

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*squees* I love your idea. *twirls you*

[carnadosa.livejournal.com]

*sits down in a dizzy daze*

It's really too bad that I can't write anything well except third person non-fiction, because the world needs more crack wherein Snape and Harry have 14 children, most of which came to be in unusual ways, like the one who's part dragon and an example of why you don't name your children while high on pain killers Salazar Gryffindor, and the twins who's animage forms are hyenas and also are vampires who steal Raven's book on bondage and tie Malfoy (senior) upside down, naked with a ball gag outside the latest Order headquarters when 9 or the one who resulted from a kinky threesome with the trickster god and is like candy to dark creatures, accidentally opened a hole to hell in the backyard when he was 5 and has a pet levifold and one, is of course, a werewolf who's indulging in his genetic destiny to be an asshole which is why his nickname is Sunshine expect when he's a friendly puppy!wolf and is an actor on stage, and the last one who's name is Omega and she's actually Tom Riddle reincarnated and also a healer who becomes one of the ducklings on House and James who has really bad temper tantrums where he sets things on fire with wild magic and all the phoenixes love him even though he called them chickens til he was four, and the one who's nickname is Lady Hex and somehow bribed the hat to put her in Hufflepuff and becomes the Headmistress and they all have that crazy shit happens to us gene from Harry.

Also, Happy Birthday!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeeeeee!!!! I LOVE THAT OMG.

[elucidate-this.livejournal.com]

heee!!! love!!!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*snugs you*

[viciouscats.livejournal.com]

OMG. You rock like a rocking thing. *loves* :)


P.S. I'm compiling dS mpreg list (shut up. like you can talk. *g*) and del.icio.us led me here. Just so you know. :)

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

*giggles hysterically* I certainly can't judge you. I'm happy you liked it. :D